The Man Who Says Things in a Very Roundabout Way


(Pompous music. Mix to spinning globe and then to two men in a studio.)

Interviewer: (Terry Jones) Good evening. Well, we have in the studio tonight a man who says things in a very roundabout way. Isn't that so, Mr Pudifoot?

Mr Pudifoot: (Graham Chapman) Yes.

Interviewer: Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

Mr Pudifoot: Yes.

Interviewer: Well, I can't help noticing that, for someone who claims to say things in a very roundabout way, your last two answers have had very little of the discursive quality about them.

Mr Pudifoot: Oh, well, I'm not very talkative today. It's a form of defensive response to intense interrogative stimuli. I used to get it badly when I was a boy... well, when I say very badly, in fact, do you remember when there was that fashion for, you know, little poodles with small coats...

Interviewer: Ah, now you're beginning to talk in a roundabout way.

Mr Pudifoot: Oh, I'm sorry.

Interviewer: No, no, no, no. Please do carry on because that is in fact why we wanted you on the show.

Mr Pudifoot: I thought it was because you were interested in me as a human being. (gets up and leaves)

Interviewer: Well... lets move on to our guest who not only lives in Essex but also speaks only the ends of words. Mr Ohn Ith. Mr Ith, good evening.

Continue to the next sketch... Man Who Speaks Only the Ends - Beginnings - Middles of Words